Tuesday, October 23, 2012


The ladies at CDI Winghaven took excellent care of me.  Joan took my history and helped me relax.  A mammogram is very easy, quick and doesn't hurt at all.  My mind is all over the place and my heart is beating rapidly as I sign in.  I so do NOT want to be here.  I promised my husband I would go, after finding out that his friends wife was just diagnosed last week.  I had seen her about a month ago.  She did not look like she had breast cancer.  That's the thing though.  You may not look like you have it or experience any symptoms so, early detection is the key.

I entered the small room, locked up my stuff and immediately noticed Hershey's kisses in a bowl.  Nice touch.  Chocolate, just what I needed. I decided that I would have one for just for coming today and a second after the exam. I put on the top they provided and was lead to another room with a lot of hi-tech machines.  I just wanted to get in and out of here as soon as possible. The exam took less then four minutes.  Joan had the shots she needed and lead me back to the chocolate room.  I dressed, grabbed my kiss and left.  In the parking lot, I let Jim know I was done and heading home. He told me he loved me and thanks for going. (encouraging spouses are awesome)

The next day my phone rang, it was my doctor office with my results.  I let it ring four times, I felt frozen in time.  I was also driving, I never answer my phone while driving.  Exception made, the receptionist informed me that my girls were fine.  Whew.  I pulled into my driveway upon hanging up and cried.  I was fine.  What a relief.  My husband pulled up right after me, he is on the phone with his friend.  His wife is doing as well as can be expected, not yet knowing what her course of action is.  Jim reassures him that she will be fine.  I tell him I have my results.  I am fine.  Jim sports a huge smile and hugs me.  This was a very awkward moment for me.  I was celebrating being healthy with tears of joy while experiencing painful tears at the same time for my friend.

Knowledge is power. If you haven't been checked yet, JUST DO IT.  Fellas, strongly suggest that your lady gets hers done. Do not accept any excuse.  Make her appointment for her.  Take her to lunch afterwards. You know you wouldn't know what to do without her, so keep her healthy.

Live life loud,

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Cancer Sucks

That being said, it is time for me to come clean.  My mother was diagnosed three years ago.  Her cancer was diagnosed early and dealt with quickly.  She told me before anyone else and swore me to secrecy.  My siblings would be told slowly over time. She wasn't sure how to tell them. - I am the oldest, I could handle it-  Within a week everyone knew.

I was pissed for a while.  Why would God give my 61 yr old mother cancer?  Give it to me, I am younger, I am stronger, I am healthier, etc... I could handle it. Her chemo seemed to take forever.  Telling her grand-kids why her hair fell out was easier than telling her grown children. ( the kids only asked a couple questions)  Fast forward to now, she is fine and passed her recent check-up with flying colors.  Turns out her biological mom was not so lucky.  My mom found out she was adopted after her bio-mom had already passed.  She had breast cancer.

I have not had an exam since 2009.  Tomorrow I have an appointment.  I am a little nervous.  I have an 85% chance of getting breast cancer.  Not easy to swallow.  I consider myself healthy.  I eat a vegetarian diet.  I exercise regularly and then some.  I do not smoke.  I have a lot going for me. However, I have two huge marks against me.  Honestly, I am afraid to go.  I don't want to know.  Then it came to me..... If I had cancer I would definitely kick its ass.  How can I kick its ass if I don't know I have it?